America Sport(s)

The French ? What have I got against the French ?

Nothing , sadly .

What would I like against them ?

An Anvil .

Bunch of pretentious wankers !

Seriously though , let's not stereotype all French people .

Actually by French people , what I mean is Parisians...and by Parisians, what I mean are those that aren't gutter-junkie eurotrash....and by those that aren't gutter junkie-eurotrash....I mean the ones that are pretentious wankers.....and by pretentious wankers I mean ALL French people.

But the French and me do one thing well : We piss off americans . Nothing against Americans , but you guys are just so damn cute when you angry . Right up until the “bunker busters” .

Now , I'm not going to start criticizing the war in Iraq , and it's supernova sized flaws . That's like clubbing baby seals , and anyone who still supports that piss guzzling ,golden shower , farce of a war is clinically brain dead , and certainly not capable of the higher mental functioning and semantics required to read . Instead I'm going to expose that festering wound , spread like Cultural Herpes world wide through ESPN : American Sport(s) !

Ice Hockey


Let's start with the festival of man love , called Ice Hockey . Not to be confused with Field Hockey - predominately played by heterosexual men , rather Ice Hockey is strictly the property of raging butt fuckers .

In fact , scientific studies have show a strong correlation between playing ice Hockey and having a limp wrist . Further strong correlations between having a limp wrist and buggering people up the bum have also been proved scientifically . Take the logical Leap , Emmanuel Kant .

When not mincing around in tight leather , bum hole , exposing pants and dog collars , Ice Hockey players are doing what they love most . Dry humping each other up against some perspex . Running around all limp wristed with their phallic objects , practicing the skills they learn in figure skating class (which they mostly joined for the tight pants) .

In short , Ice Hockey is an atrocity against sport . Either it should lose it's status as a sport , or the art of dildo buggery (“played” in gimp suits) should also be labeled a sport . What next ? Man on man rim jobs coming live from the Olympics ?



Next : American football .


Often compared to it's manly cousin "Rugby" . If we must compare the two things , there is only one thing that needs saying : Rugby is played with bigger balls !

Rugby : Big balls

American Football : Small balls

Getting the picture?

That's not even to mention the tight pants , shoulder pads , doing a lot of bending over . And the last time I saw so many grown men in tight pants dancing like retards , I was watching Ballet . I'm hearing Tchaikovsky's "swan lake" just thinking about American Football . And that's NOT a good thing !



Baseball

Ah yes , Baseball .






Nuff Said .



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