who is this great man ?

The two most common questions asked when in relation to me are :

1) Who is this great man ?...and 2) How did he get so well endowed ?

The second question is a secret....but it involves a whale , hard work and determination .

The first part I will attempt to answer .


To describe in full the extent of my greatness , would be like to write an encylopedia of awesomeness . Which is probably going to be the title of my next book , as soon as I get my current one on the shelves (Women : A guidebook and a warning) . But I shall try and answer you questions none the less .

Q)Where do you come from , oh well endowed one ?

A) I hail from the great land of South Africa . Arch enemy and defender against all things Australian in nature .

Q) You sure hate Australia , don't you ?

A) While that sure may seem the case , in reality that's only because it's entirely true . Anyone who doesn't hate Australia is clinically insane , or too lazy to accept their responsibilities as a man . They should be forced to have shane warnes jock strap rubbed into their faces .

Q) Is it true you can make women orgasm with your dance moves alone ?

A) It is entirely true .

Q) Do you really have a doomsday device ?

A) No . And by no , I mean , absolutely : Yes .

Q) Do you hate women ?

A) That is a ridiculous assumption .And by ridiculous I mean "fair , balanced and deserved " . but I also deeply love them . And by "love" , I mean : want to sleep il

Q) When you say "34" , you mean centimetres or inches ?

A) Feet .

T.B.C







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