What to eradicate poverty ? why not start with eradicating the poor ?

A common critique of my writing  and on some levels my personality seems to be that on the surface level it would seem perhaps I propose we kill everything. I find this hurtful and simply untrue. There are many, many things I don't suggest we kill. However ,” kwwzi” the neighbours dove is certainly not one of them.

Seriously , fuck kwezi .

There are so many things I hate about kwezi , I don't even know where to start. Stupid Kwezi , always puffing his feathery chest out. Puffing his chest out and shitting. And when he's not poo , poo poing he's coo , coo cooing...just.shut the fuck up kwezi !

I know it's wrong to shoot things. But if I could I'd shoot Kwezi. A lot.

However whilst Kwezi is certainly a foul demon from hell spawned only to piss me off. I am not here today to talk about that jerk. There are more pressing matters and I'm rather here to do my bit for a better future ... namely : to suggest we rid the world of poor people .

Seriously let's face it. Poor people are pretty crap. They wear lame, old mismatched clothing like they think they're too cool to conform for society.  Oh poor people are much to cool to be fashion conscious and follow even a modicum of social convention. Oh no, they just wear any old thing. Pretentious hipsters !

Besides that poor people are always complaining and trying to steal all the attention as if it's all about them !

“Hey guys look at me ! I'm so hungry ! Check out how hungry I am guys ! Everyone ! I'm hungry ! Wow ! I sure an hungrier than you guys ! Quick! Check me out ! Look at Me ...Me ! Me ! Me !”

See ? What assholes. When I'm hungry I don't make a fuss. I just go out and buy something to eat. I don't go hastling random strangers and telling them about it. What next poor people ? Going to tell us when you need a shit too ?

Poor people are lame and uneducated. And why must they always complain so much ? Why can't they just accept they are poor because God hates them ? And God's right to hate them. They smell funny because once again they're way to cool to bring themsleves down to our level of general hygene. Also poor people never hang out anywhere like pubs or restuarants where normal people hang out as if again they think they're too good for the rest of us. God in my interpretation of him has no time for arrogant elitists.

Perhaps if you are not convinced , consider with the exception of Australia, if you look at the crappest countries in the world , what do they all have in common ? That's right ! Lots of poor people !

Coincidence ? I think not !

So what's the solution ? Well of course by now you are all suggesting and shouting “Kill the smelly , thin bastards!” and in theory I agree however we need to look at the bigger picture.

The world has billions of poor people  and it would take weeks perhaps even months to kill them all. While It would be great fun but this is far too long a time for me to tolerate poor people any longer. Instead we need to focus our attention in another direction. To be most effective I have a suggestion ...

You can tell a lot about someone by who the associate with. Poor people always have crap friends like Bono and Bob Geldorf, both of whom are amongst other crap things, musicians. And if there's someone you can't trust it's a musician.

When not finding new and creative ways to contract std's musicians spend their time playing charity shows. The money which goes towards feeding poor people. Every day we feed poor people is another day we have to listen to their whining and self aggradisment.  The solution ? As the old saying goes “two birds with one stone” my friends .... Kill musicians. Starting with Cristina Aguilera, Beyonce, Rihanna and Britney Spears in case we change our minds soon after. Apperently while haplessly browsing through a magazine rack at Spar for a copy of "misathrope monthly" I saw on the cover of "people" (well named magazine that considering the content) that Rhinna is now known affectionately to the general moronic public as "Ri Ri". There was no immediete sign of irony present and this magazine seems intended for adults. Really people ? 

Ask yourself , one day when your children grow up and have to give their hard earned taxes to poor people, will you be able to look them in the eye ? Will you be able to sleep peacefully at night in full knowledge that when on that fateful day , the hour came to be counted , you stood up and flat out bitch slapped the impoverished ?

Or will you live a life of shame and regret ?